As a Former Athlete, Is Your Athlete Identity Keeping You Stuck?

And How Can You Get Unstuck?

What is athlete identity?  It is the extent to which a person identifies with being an athlete.  It refers to the psychological attachment that people form with their athletic abilities, achievements and their involvement in sports. On one hand, a strong athletic identity can be a powerful source of motivation and fulfillment for athletes, giving them a sense of purpose and belonging.  However, a very strong athletic identity can also have a negative impact by limiting the person’s focus on other aspects of their life and purpose and can make the transition out of sports much more difficult. After sports retirement, your athletic identity may start to lessen, but it can still keep you from fully experiencing your life after sports.

Let’s start here.  If you had and still have a strong athletic identity, you may have established some rules for yourself.  Things like, “I was a (your sport) player.  I should be able to (physical skill).”  Or maybe it’s something like “My friends are all (your sport) players because they get me better than other people.”  It could also be something more punitive like, “If I can’t (insert high skill expectation here), I can no longer call myself a (your sport) player.”  These are just examples.  Your rules could be any rigid expectations you have set to define who you are.  

Or maybe you have beliefs about yourself related to your time as an athlete.  Something like “ I have to keep working out at least 5 days a week to stay in peak condition.”  Or maybe it’s “I’m bad at (other physical activity/sport)” because it’s so much different than your sport.  Or “I can’t learn (non-sport skill) because I’m only good at physical skills”.

Here’s the problem with this.  When you are attached to these rules and beliefs as absolute truths, you limit yourself to all sorts of possibilities.  Viewing yourself in such a rigid way, dismisses the fact that you are so much more than just an athlete retired from your sport.  It doesn’t define who you are.  If you can’t unstick yourself from all these limitations you have created, you will have a very difficult time evolving from your athletic identity and discovering your new values in your post-sport life.

The thoughts and feelings that happened to make you establish these rigid rules and self-limiting beliefs are just thoughts.  Fluctuations of the mind that you don’t have to view as facts or truths.  When you start to see thoughts and feelings for what they are and not attach to them as part of yourself, you can start to observe your thoughts and intentionally decide how you react to them, if at all.

Sounds like a big ask, right? So where do you start?  Start with mindfulness practices.  Learning how to be fully in the present moment helps you start to see all those inflexible rules and negative thoughts as actions of the mind that can be noticed and then sent on their merry way if they are not serving you and moving you in the direction you want to go.  When we can observe our experiences without judgment (a key part of mindfulness), then we can detach from the ones that are not helpful or are keeping us stuck fully in our athletic identity.

Curious?  If so, you can give this brief mindful meditation practice a try.  It is designed for former athletes and focuses on letting go of athletic identity.

As a former competitive athlete, I know that the idea of letting go of your athlete identity is a difficult one.  The athlete works so hard to perform at their highest potential, dedicating so much of their life to doing so.  I am not advocating for retired athletes to completely rid themselves of this identity.  Being an athlete gives us so many life skills and tools that will help us excel in our life after sports.  That list is long and worthy of its own blog post in the future.  These skills are the things to notice and acknowledge they will move us toward a fulfilling life.  It is also powerful and freeing to be able to let go of the parts of that identity that are no longer serving us and moving us away from what we truly value.

There is a way for former athletes to combine the best experiences from their athletic careers with new skills to move toward a healthy, balanced and value-driven life after sports.

If you tried the mindful meditation practice above and it resonated with you, I invite you to dive a little deeper into how mindfulness, the practice of yoga and behavior changes strategies can help guide your transition out of competitive sports.  The Vintage Athlete Awakening is a FREE 3-day series designed to introduce you to these practices.  Start your experience by signing up here.